Growing up my family was not the super affectionate kind. We didn’t say….I love you when leaving, or have to hug and kiss when we encountered each other. We pretty much just assumed that we all knew how the other felt and carried on from there. I didn’t grow up feeling unloved or unattached in any way. I actually felt pretty close to my immediate family growing up. It wasn’t until I became an adult, and started experiencing death that I begin to notice the differences in my families interactions. It was when I experienced loss that I wanted to be closer to those alive. I guess we don’t realize what we have loss until we lose love ones. The missed or avoided hugs, kisses, and I love you’s, all become wishes that will never be met.
That is why now, I have opened up much more emotionally and learned to express my love while I have my love ones here with me. During this this holiday time, many of us will travel to see family members, and some of us will have family come over to visit with us. But, let’s not forget the family that doesn’t come or the family that we may have falling out with in the past. It’s never too late to forgive or just embrace someone that you have limited contact with. It’s also never to late to step outside of your comfort zone and start showing those around you more love and affection.
Our family and friends, are the people who will be able to love us unconditionally. Sure we will argue with each other and disagree, but that doesn’t mean that we love each other any less. Showing each other love creates a memory that will last forever in our minds. It could be the last memory for some and the happiest memory for many. There are times that I feel drained and I will think of a love one smiling at me or them hugging me and immediately feel warmth again. Our lives are emptier without affection. Not being affectionate does not make us stronger. It makes us weak and often means that we’re afraid. Most times we’re afraid to get too close, because we fear the connection. This holiday, be sure to embrace all of your love ones and let everyone know why you are thankful for them!! Let this Holiday season, be full of giving.
Kristina – Kristopher’s Mom