Security blankets can be anything that makes you feel safe, comfortable and secure. It can be people, places and or things. I lost my security blanket when my mother passed away. She was my safe place. It was the worst thing that I’ve ever encountered and it still hurts every single day. Recently I’ve let go of another security blanket, which was my job as a probation officer.
I was at my job for 6 years, which to me is a lifetime since that’s the longest that I’ve ever been at a job. All of my big life events happened while I was there. I got married, had a baby, bought a house and lost my mother. Although it was hard to leave, it was even harder to stay. I was very comfortable there. I had freedom, job security, decent pay and great relationships with my coworkers and supervisor, but I wasn’t happy. I was unfulfilled and I was becoming bitter due to the constant negative environment and the doom and gloom of my clients circumstances. It’s a bad feeling when you see so much despair and feel completely helpless.
I’ve actively looked for jobs for about four years consistently! Yes four years, LOL! I was also very particular my job search. If I was going to give up all of the perks that I had, it had to be worth it. I’ve gone on so many interviews and felt confident that I would get most of the jobs that I’ve interviewed for, LOL. That, however, wasn’t the case and for whatever reason things don’t always go according to our plans. Eventually I understood that it wasn’t my time yet but I refused to give up because I was on a mission so I still looked and applied for jobs almost daily.
Now my time has come. I’ve started a new career and it’s been an interesting transition. I get up earlier in the morning and my commute is much longer. I don’t have the freedom or the security blanket that I once had. I’m starting from scratch with having to build my leave back up and learn a whole new job. I’ll be the first to tell you that change is scary and hard and sometimes it hurts! One of my favorite quotes is “change cannot occur until the pain of staying the same exceeds the pain of change “(author unknown). I wholeheartedly agree with this. Although I’m completely out of my comfort zone, I feel like a weight has been lifted off of me. We all have our own paths in front of us, but I encourage you to let go of whatever is no longer serving you, be it so-called friends, associates, jobs or negative situations. Also, don’t let fear hold you back from doing what you need to do for you and yours! If fear is no longer a factor then the possibilities are endless. You can choose to live in fear and let it hold you back, or you can learn to let go, take risks, and follow a better path.
“If it doesn’t scare the Sh** out of you then don’t do it” (Author unknown)
~Kristle (a Fearless Mommy)